Communicating is an essential part of life, especially in building, maintaining, and growing relationships. Romantic relationships are a beautiful thing. It involves two people with different backgrounds, personalities, interests, wants, needs, goals, values, beliefs, and more coming together to form one cohesive unit.
While partners tend to find one another based on some shared interests, hobbies, and personalities, no two people will be exactly the same. This means that at some point or another, tough conversations and even arguments are bound to happen. These types of conversations don't mean that these two people are no longer good for one another. Tough conversations are a normal part of relationships and life.
You may not be able to avoid them, but you can work to make sure they remain healthy no matter the topic of conversation or how challenging it may be to navigate. This is how to have healthy discussions with your partner about your relationship.
Be Open and Honest
No matter the topic of conversation, you and your partner should always feel like you can be honest with one another. Even if it's a difficult topic of conversation, you both should feel like the other person is open to your thoughts and opinions without receiving backlash for speaking up.
Being open and honest with one another is important for a healthy relationship. Make sure you each are clearly communicating your wants, needs, and expectations. You can't expect your partner to read your mind, but you also want to make sure your boundaries aren't being crossed.
Use "I" Statements
Be mindful of your tone of voice, body language, and word choices when you're speaking with your partner. Using "I" statements can keep the conversation in a more positive direction than if you were to use "you" statements. A simple change in wording can help your partner empathize with your perspective instead of becoming defensive.
Practice Active Listening
Remember that when you're having a healthy conversation with your partner, there's more to communicating than just speaking what's on your mind. Listening to what your partner is saying to you is equally important as sharing your wants and needs.
You and your partner should both have time to speak and time to listen to one another. Make sure you know the difference between listening versus active listening. Active listening means you're fully engaged and present. This involves turning off any distractions, leaning in, making eye contact with them, not interrupting them, and asking any clarifying questions when they're done speaking so that you can ensure you're both on the same page.
Don't Fight to Win
When you're in a relationship, there are no winners and losers. You and your partner are on the same team. No matter what type of conversation you're having, it's important not to fight to win. When you're speaking with your partner, even if you have conflicting views, hear both sides and come to a mutual resolution where each partner feels like they didn't have to give up on their personal beliefs just to satisfy the other.
Keep the Past in the Past
Another way to ensure that your conversations remain healthy is to keep the conversation in the present moment. Disagreements help you and your partner dive deeper, learn more, and grow yourselves and your relationship together. But any past disagreements should stay in the past. Once you and your partner resolve an issue, you shouldn't feel the need to bring it up every time you have another disagreement. Make sure you're focusing on the present so the conversation is staying relevant and on track.
Next Steps
It's possible to have healthy conversations with your partner, even during those not-so-fun topics of conversation. If you and your partner are looking for additional support or guidance, reach out today to set up an initial consultation.